[PARODY] The Staff Training Course
Jun 27, 2015 14:16:33 GMT -5
Kitsune, Roygbiv, and 1 more like this
Post by Roygbiv on Jun 27, 2015 14:16:33 GMT -5
WARNING: THERE IS SOME SWEAR WORDS AND SOME INAPPROPRIATE SITUATIONS. NOT FOR SENSITIVE OR YOUNG PEOPLE.
Parody of Spongebob Squarepants: Krusty Krab Training video. This is all a joke enjoy reading
Kitsune: Welcome aboard. If you're reading this thread, then let me be the first to say You've recently been hired in the WeRevolt Forums and this is your first official day of training.
Roygbiv: Can I be a moderator now?
Deci: Oh no, you've got a lot to learn before you're ready to moderate. As you can see by this graph... *AHEM* Graph. You have been employed in one of the most unsuccessful forum on the Internet. But it didn't happen that way way over night...because the forum closes at 6:00. No, the story of the WeRevolt forums is the story of one fox's hard work, perseverance, vision, determination and sweat. But mostly her sweat. From Humble Beginnings. You may think that Mrs. Kitsune, owner and founder of WeRevolt Forums has always been the financial wizard she is today. And you're wrong! After the Beautiful Forums war, Foxy stayed secluded in a deep depression that seemed endless. But then her luck changed when she acquired a demotion of her administrative rank from BF and with a few minor alterations, the WeRevolt Forums was born. Sounds like a lot of...
David: Faggot!
Deci: Sounds like a lot of...
David: Faggot!
Deci: Sounds like a...
David: Faggot! Faggot!
Deci: Sounds like a lot of hoopla to make over a little Forum site right? Ha ha, WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!! The WeRevolt Forums today. To keep up with today's demanding members, no expense has been spared to acquire all the latest achievements in forum technology.
Kitsune: This here's an advanced mind-control mechanism. Here you can see our automated spamming system. Don't touch! These are high-quality thread creating devices. Imported. This heres a prototype posting machine. And most importantly, You get your state-of-the-art asshole staff members. Now, are you gonna post something or just sit there cause there's a sitting fee.
Deci: All of this modernization seems a little overwhelming, doesn't it? Well luckily for you, Kitsunes' fear of chromebook overlords keeps the balance of technology in check. But if modernization is the heart of the WeRevolt Forums, then staff members are the anus and rectum. Let's see if you got what it takes. Hmmm, insane, immature, and a smile that says, "Hello, I’m going to rape you!" You've got the makings of a good moderator, Miss Roygbiv But for every good moderator, there is one who is not so good. Let's see, inattentive, impatient, a glazed look in the eyes. Look carefully at the button. There's a name for staff members like this, but we'll call him David.
David: I'm getting paid overtime for this, right Kitsune?
Kitsune: Sorry, can't hear you, my chromebook isn't working!
Deci: Training.
Roygbiv: Does this mean I get to be a moderator now?
Deci: No, you can't be a moderator without understanding the phrase FAGGOT.
Roygbiv: FAGGOT?
Deci: Once you understand FAGGOT, you'll understand your place at the WeRevolt Forums. But what does FAGGOT mean? It's actually a carefully organized code. Watch closely. You Are A Faggot.
Roygbiv: Ah, FAGGOT!
Deci: Looks like Miss Roygbiv understands FAGGOT. Here's a typical member. I wonder what she wants. Well, if we just remember FAGGOT, we can figure it out.
Shannon: I'd like to--
Deci: Do you think she wants : A: A free staff rank, B: Money, or C: A sofa?
Shannon: One sofa please.
Deci: Ah, FAGGOT! You never let us down! Now that you understand FAGGOT, I bet you think you're ready to be a moderator.
Roygbiv: Moderator!
Deci: Ha-ha! Not so fast, Faggot McFaggot. We haven't even talked about: Personal Hygiene. Every staff member at the WeRevolt Forum must comply with a strict set of personal hygiene guidelines. OK, Miss Roygbiv, are you ready to prepare for your shift? A good staff member always trims her pubic hair thoroughly. Be sure to get under those [CENSORED]. And don't forget about the [CENSORED]. And make sure those [CENSORED] are squeaky clean. All right, let's see those.
Now that's thorough! After making sure your nonexistent boots are polished, your vagina is ridden of any blemishes or boils, and your pubic hair is neat and tidy, you are ready to start the day. Now lets see how David prepares for his shift. Remember, no employee wants to be a David! Now that you're clean and hygienic, I bet you think you're ready to moderate this site.
Roygbiv: I'm ready! I'm ready!! I'm ready!!!!!!
Deci: Whoa there! We have a few more topics to cover first. Your Work Station. It's important to keep your area messy and free of space. But a dirty workstation is only part of the job. To make the vision in your head a reality, you'll need supplies. And a good staff member always keeps his supplies disorganized. Very nice Miss Roygbiv, not an idiot out of place. Now let's see how David keeps his work station.
David: Huh? Oh!
Deci: Don't worry David, Miss Roygbiv can cover for you. Now that your workstation is up and running, perhaps you think you're ready to moderate world-famous dumster. Calm down. There's plenty of time left. We have to make sure you're ready for the psychological aspect of the job: Interfacing with your Boss.
Roygbiv: Mommy, can I be the owner?
Kitsune: No.
Deci: Good job, Miss Roygbiv!
Roygbiv: Can I be a moderator now--
Deci: Now we go from behind the scenes to the front lines, where we'll examine the most important aspect of the industry, the member. Or as we like to say, the "Inferior Idiot".
Shopoke: Who said that? Are you a ghost?
Deci: Like precious, precious blood in an animal, the member is what makes the WeRevolt Forums strong and alive.
Shopoke: David, your website is talking to me!
David: Are you going to post something or just make friends with the website paneling?
Shopoke: Uhh... I'll uhh... uhh... uhh... ah... Huh? What's that?
David: Sho, go be stupid somewhere else.
Deci: Ah-ah-ah, David, remember what Kitsune says.
Kitsune: Fox Clan is my life!
Shopoke: The ceiling is right David, you're not a very good moderator
David: Fine. May you please do something?
Shopoke: Uhh... uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
Deci: We'll check up on these two later. Right now, it's important that we discuss an emergency situation! Like Ala's love for children, many consider the WeRevolt forums to be a treasure. And as with every treasure, there's a thief ready to steal it. So it's up to you to be the watchful eyes of... What's this? It's Kitsune's business rival, Alakazam!!
Ala: Eat my microscopic drawf dust, Kitsune! Your forum is finally mine!
Deci: He's stealing Kitsune's credit card information! What are you going to do, Miss Roygbiv?
Roygbiv: Become the next Miley Cyrus?
Ala: You'll never catch me, Kitsune, not after I switch into maximum overdrive! Hi-ya! I knew I should have gotten the turbo..
Roygbiv: I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL!!!
Ala: Hear me Kitsune! You'll take this forum from me when you pry it from my cold, dead...
Deci: And so, another emergency is avoided, thanks to Miss Roygbiv Let's check in on David again. Psst, David.
David: Huh?
Deci: Just remember FAGGOT.
David: Shopoke, if I could make a suggestion. why don't you just post a thread?
Shopoke: Great idea, David!
David: Which subforum will that be? Wait--UGH NO!
Deci: Hang in there David, it's all part of the job. Now that you've learned the basics of your training, it's time for the moment you've been waiting for. Moderating the website. At the center of every great dynasty is the crown jewel which keeps it alive and bribing. For the WeRevolt Forums, this is the Admin Control Panel. And now you, the humble staff member off the street, the all-too-necessary human resource that keeps this business afloat, will learn the sacred and dark secrets of how to ban, with your very own hands... the sumptuousness, lip-moistening, spine-tingling, heart-stopping pleasure center that is the ACP! Are you ready? Are you sure? Ok! The secret password is--
Parody of Spongebob Squarepants: Krusty Krab Training video. This is all a joke enjoy reading
Kitsune: Welcome aboard. If you're reading this thread, then let me be the first to say You've recently been hired in the WeRevolt Forums and this is your first official day of training.
Roygbiv: Can I be a moderator now?
Deci: Oh no, you've got a lot to learn before you're ready to moderate. As you can see by this graph... *AHEM* Graph. You have been employed in one of the most unsuccessful forum on the Internet. But it didn't happen that way way over night...because the forum closes at 6:00. No, the story of the WeRevolt forums is the story of one fox's hard work, perseverance, vision, determination and sweat. But mostly her sweat. From Humble Beginnings. You may think that Mrs. Kitsune, owner and founder of WeRevolt Forums has always been the financial wizard she is today. And you're wrong! After the Beautiful Forums war, Foxy stayed secluded in a deep depression that seemed endless. But then her luck changed when she acquired a demotion of her administrative rank from BF and with a few minor alterations, the WeRevolt Forums was born. Sounds like a lot of...
David: Faggot!
Deci: Sounds like a lot of...
David: Faggot!
Deci: Sounds like a...
David: Faggot! Faggot!
Deci: Sounds like a lot of hoopla to make over a little Forum site right? Ha ha, WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!! The WeRevolt Forums today. To keep up with today's demanding members, no expense has been spared to acquire all the latest achievements in forum technology.
Kitsune: This here's an advanced mind-control mechanism. Here you can see our automated spamming system. Don't touch! These are high-quality thread creating devices. Imported. This heres a prototype posting machine. And most importantly, You get your state-of-the-art asshole staff members. Now, are you gonna post something or just sit there cause there's a sitting fee.
Deci: All of this modernization seems a little overwhelming, doesn't it? Well luckily for you, Kitsunes' fear of chromebook overlords keeps the balance of technology in check. But if modernization is the heart of the WeRevolt Forums, then staff members are the anus and rectum. Let's see if you got what it takes. Hmmm, insane, immature, and a smile that says, "Hello, I’m going to rape you!" You've got the makings of a good moderator, Miss Roygbiv But for every good moderator, there is one who is not so good. Let's see, inattentive, impatient, a glazed look in the eyes. Look carefully at the button. There's a name for staff members like this, but we'll call him David.
David: I'm getting paid overtime for this, right Kitsune?
Kitsune: Sorry, can't hear you, my chromebook isn't working!
Deci: Training.
Roygbiv: Does this mean I get to be a moderator now?
Deci: No, you can't be a moderator without understanding the phrase FAGGOT.
Roygbiv: FAGGOT?
Deci: Once you understand FAGGOT, you'll understand your place at the WeRevolt Forums. But what does FAGGOT mean? It's actually a carefully organized code. Watch closely. You Are A Faggot.
Roygbiv: Ah, FAGGOT!
Deci: Looks like Miss Roygbiv understands FAGGOT. Here's a typical member. I wonder what she wants. Well, if we just remember FAGGOT, we can figure it out.
Shannon: I'd like to--
Deci: Do you think she wants : A: A free staff rank, B: Money, or C: A sofa?
Shannon: One sofa please.
Deci: Ah, FAGGOT! You never let us down! Now that you understand FAGGOT, I bet you think you're ready to be a moderator.
Roygbiv: Moderator!
Deci: Ha-ha! Not so fast, Faggot McFaggot. We haven't even talked about: Personal Hygiene. Every staff member at the WeRevolt Forum must comply with a strict set of personal hygiene guidelines. OK, Miss Roygbiv, are you ready to prepare for your shift? A good staff member always trims her pubic hair thoroughly. Be sure to get under those [CENSORED]. And don't forget about the [CENSORED]. And make sure those [CENSORED] are squeaky clean. All right, let's see those.
{Spoiler}
Now that's thorough! After making sure your nonexistent boots are polished, your vagina is ridden of any blemishes or boils, and your pubic hair is neat and tidy, you are ready to start the day. Now lets see how David prepares for his shift. Remember, no employee wants to be a David! Now that you're clean and hygienic, I bet you think you're ready to moderate this site.
Roygbiv: I'm ready! I'm ready!! I'm ready!!!!!!
Deci: Whoa there! We have a few more topics to cover first. Your Work Station. It's important to keep your area messy and free of space. But a dirty workstation is only part of the job. To make the vision in your head a reality, you'll need supplies. And a good staff member always keeps his supplies disorganized. Very nice Miss Roygbiv, not an idiot out of place. Now let's see how David keeps his work station.
David: Huh? Oh!
Deci: Don't worry David, Miss Roygbiv can cover for you. Now that your workstation is up and running, perhaps you think you're ready to moderate world-famous dumster. Calm down. There's plenty of time left. We have to make sure you're ready for the psychological aspect of the job: Interfacing with your Boss.
Roygbiv: Mommy, can I be the owner?
Kitsune: No.
Deci: Good job, Miss Roygbiv!
Roygbiv: Can I be a moderator now--
Deci: Now we go from behind the scenes to the front lines, where we'll examine the most important aspect of the industry, the member. Or as we like to say, the "Inferior Idiot".
Shopoke: Who said that? Are you a ghost?
Deci: Like precious, precious blood in an animal, the member is what makes the WeRevolt Forums strong and alive.
Shopoke: David, your website is talking to me!
David: Are you going to post something or just make friends with the website paneling?
Shopoke: Uhh... I'll uhh... uhh... uhh... ah... Huh? What's that?
David: Sho, go be stupid somewhere else.
Deci: Ah-ah-ah, David, remember what Kitsune says.
Kitsune: Fox Clan is my life!
Shopoke: The ceiling is right David, you're not a very good moderator
David: Fine. May you please do something?
Shopoke: Uhh... uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
Deci: We'll check up on these two later. Right now, it's important that we discuss an emergency situation! Like Ala's love for children, many consider the WeRevolt forums to be a treasure. And as with every treasure, there's a thief ready to steal it. So it's up to you to be the watchful eyes of... What's this? It's Kitsune's business rival, Alakazam!!
Ala: Eat my microscopic drawf dust, Kitsune! Your forum is finally mine!
Deci: He's stealing Kitsune's credit card information! What are you going to do, Miss Roygbiv?
Roygbiv: Become the next Miley Cyrus?
Ala: You'll never catch me, Kitsune, not after I switch into maximum overdrive! Hi-ya! I knew I should have gotten the turbo..
Roygbiv: I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL!!!
Ala: Hear me Kitsune! You'll take this forum from me when you pry it from my cold, dead...
Deci: And so, another emergency is avoided, thanks to Miss Roygbiv Let's check in on David again. Psst, David.
David: Huh?
Deci: Just remember FAGGOT.
David: Shopoke, if I could make a suggestion. why don't you just post a thread?
Shopoke: Great idea, David!
David: Which subforum will that be? Wait--UGH NO!
Deci: Hang in there David, it's all part of the job. Now that you've learned the basics of your training, it's time for the moment you've been waiting for. Moderating the website. At the center of every great dynasty is the crown jewel which keeps it alive and bribing. For the WeRevolt Forums, this is the Admin Control Panel. And now you, the humble staff member off the street, the all-too-necessary human resource that keeps this business afloat, will learn the sacred and dark secrets of how to ban, with your very own hands... the sumptuousness, lip-moistening, spine-tingling, heart-stopping pleasure center that is the ACP! Are you ready? Are you sure? Ok! The secret password is--